Hullo!

I have not disappeared.  I could say things have been crazy... but then everyone says that... and I just did, too... and then, it's probably a basic fact of life for most of us Western World Dwellers.  Craziness of some sort, that is.

Anyways, I just wanted to say hey!  And to share a great homemaking quote from an amazing book.  This is part of the reason I value homemaking as a high and noble calling, which I am grateful to be able to pursue:

Through the whole panorama of Scripture (and through most of history), we see the home and family as woman’s context. Home was not woman’s prison — it was her base of operations, from which she engaged in commerce, ministry, charity, medicine, the arts, and more. The family, though, was always her priority.

-Anna Sofia and Elizabeth Botkin, from their book So Much More-

"The family, though, was always her priority."  Good reminder to not get so caught up in the "stuff" of homemaking that I forget to love the people I'm doing those things for!

Quotes from "The Princess and Curdie"

"A mountain is a strange and awful thing.  In old times, without knowing so much of their strangeness and awfulness as we do, people were yet more afraid of mountains.  But then somehow they had not come to see how beautiful they are as well as awful, and they hated them - and what people hate they must fear.  Now that we have learned to look at them with admiration, perhaps we do not feel quite awe enough of them.  To me they are beautiful terrors."

"Nothing that could be got from the heart of the earth could have been put to better purpose than the silver the king's miners got for him.  There were people in the country who, when it came into their hands, degraded it by locking it up in a chest, and then it grew diseased and was called mammon, and bred all sorts of quarrels; but when first it left the king's hands it never made any but friends, and the air of the world kept it clean."

"He might have been a captain, they did believe!  The good kind people did not reflect that the road to the next duty is the only straight one, or that, for their fancied good, we should never wish our children or friends to do what we would not do ourselves if we were in their position.  We must accept righteous sacrifices as well as make them." 

~from Chapter One of The Princess and Curdie~

 by George MacDonald

Study, Random, and a Goose Egg

When was the last time I challenged myself to find out if a long-held belief or way of doing things was actually Scriptural?

When was the last time I dove into some serious Bible study, taking notes, making lots of observations, seeing what is there instead of what I want to see?

When was the last time I was able to flip open a Bible and humbly explain a concept or principle, without fear of having taken anything out of context or of making it say what it didn't?

Too long ago, that's when.

Well, I plan on doing some deep digging in the following days.  I might even post some of my findings here as part of the process.  And hopefully at the end I'll be able to explain with Scripture, clear thinking, and personal conviction why I believe some of the "odd" things I do. :-)  And if my views change in the process, so much the better!  What better to change me than Scripture?  

In other news, I've been:

• spending time with my dear dad, who visited this weekend - I love you Daddy!
• lunch at my grandparents after church
• good conversations with my friend Erik :-)
• drinking some lovely white and herbal tea I got for Christmas
• writing book reviews 
• learning to write press releases 
• picking early flowers from our garden and putting them in a teacup
• eating chocolate 
• cooking 
• watching Arsenic and Old Lace with two sweet friends (I hope I didn't scar them for life, hehe!)
• admiring my brother Zach's muscles (he's getting ready for the Marines)
• listening to barbershop quartets while my mom cuts Bob's hair
• thinking about the blessing of children, homeschooling, and media discernment
• helping my mom carry little seedlings inside every night, and outside in the morning
• taking my Puppy to AWANA for Stuffed Animal Night
• listening to Adventures in Odyssey
• fiddling with piano and irish whistle
• not wanting to buy anything else from China
• pondering the amazing beginning of the sentence "But God..."
• walking with a mom, her little girl, and their dog
• drinking in wisdom from an elder
• chatting with my Thinkling friends on Google chat
• getting on Blogger too often without actually posting anything ;-)
• looking at my goose egg I painted and scribbled on 
• taking too many pictures with my webcam

Well, I don't have anything else to say, and it's getting late, so adios from the West Texas hobbit hole!

Book Review - The Last Thing I Remember

The Last Thing I Remember
By Andrew Klavan

This was a totally engrossing, action/suspense packed, honest and wholesome adventure.  When my mom was telling me about it, I thought it sounded like a modern-day Christian take on Hardy Boys.  After reading it, I'd say not quite.  There's more meat to it.  More suspense and tension, and a bit more violence, but also more inner-struggles and heroic choices that were soo refreshing to find in such a "cool" modern yarn!  It also struck me as a great book for guys, though I enjoyed it very much as well.

Charlie West was just a normal kid.  Good grades, decent at karate, with a slightly-distant dad, a over-anxious mom, and a silly older sister.  He has his loyal friends, a teacher who likes to harass Charlie for his faith and patriotism, and a kindhearted girl who scares him more than anything.  Life wasn't perfect, but neither was it impressive.

There was nothing in it, in fact, to explain how Charlie wakes up to find himself captured by Islamic terrorist planning his demise.  

As he attempts to escape and find out what has happened since he went to sleep at the end of that normal day, Charlie begins a journey of discovering many things.  Who he is.  What's actually important in life.  What it means to never give up when you know you're right.  The joys of home and family and peace and justice, so little appreciated by most people until they're gone.

It was this last point that stuck out to me the most.  So many teen adventure, and novels in general, encourage us to wish for escape, to be discontent with our humdrum lives.  I know.  I've felt it.  It's a temptation to escape for a while, to live on the wild and dangerous side, to have the thrilling life of adventure we see in so many stories.

But I  believe that the mark of a truely healthy, edifying, and great book is that it doesn't simply provide temporary escape from which we're reluctant to return.  Instead, they send us back to real life with a new appreciation and greatfulness for what we've been given, for the people and blessings and trials of our own.  Really good books encourage us to love the humdrum life in all it's everyday glory.  Because it is glorious, if we will only see it as an invaluable gift, a precious blessing we must sometimes fight to preserve. 

The sequel, The Long Way Home, was also good.  I can't wait until the other two books in The Homelander Series come out!

(The only warning I would give to parents is a very mild and clean romance and more intensity and violence than Hardy Boys.  Consider reading  it yourself first.  You just might have a hard time putting it down!)

Posted for the March of Books on YLCF

Book Review - The Great Divorce

The Great Divorce
By C. S. Lewis

I've now read this little book twice in less than a year, and I'm sure I'll be dipping back into it for decades to come.    What a gem!  It's a fairly quick read, but since it's Lewis, you might want to go slow with a pencil to mark all the great quotes.

The premise is this:  a busload of people from a dull and dreary town are taken to a wonderful land and given the choice to stay or go back to their self-centered lives. Tragically, few actually choose to stay.  Convictingly, their reasons are often all too familiar and close to home.

I had the amazing opportunity to read this for the first time last summer for one of my Next Step Discipleship classes.  For one week we broke into discussion groups, taking turns reading passages aloud, and talking about the book.  In my group was Ian Campbell, a tall Scotsman with an amazing accent.

Well, at some point in the book, George MacDonald shows up.  He's an old Scottish preacher whose writing greatly influenced Lewis.  And his parts were read by the only natural person in our group - Ian from Scotland.

Let me tell you, that's a memory I won't soon forget.  :-) 

'There are only two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, in the end, "Thy will be done."

~ C. S. Lewis ~

Posted for the March of Books on YLCF

Book Review - The Heavenly Man

The Heavenly Man
By Brother Yun and Paul Hattaway

I don't read enough Christian biographies.  Maybe one a year.  The last one was A Severe Mercy (which my mom's reading right now), and that one was glorious.  But partly its enjoyment came from the magical writing.  Whether the writing is engrossing or not, I know there is a wealth of wisdom and insight waiting to be gleaned from the lives of saints who have gone before.

This book has been sitting on our shelf for years, but what finally drove me to take it down and dive in was a newly-wakened desire to get into the mind of the house church Christians in China.  And let me tell you, it was eye-opening!  Not amazing writing, but definitely an amazing tale.

Brother Yun's story covers his conversion as a young boy in a poor village, his frequent persecution, torture, and imprisonment, and his ministry to everyone from house church members to prison guards.    It is a testimony of God's faithfulness and the joy he offers to those who embrace persecution (Matthew 5:10) 

"I didn't suffer for Jesus in prison.  No!  I was with Jesus and I experienced His very real presence, joy, and peace every day.  It's not those in prison for the sake of the gospel who suffer.  The person who suffers is he who never experiences God's intimate presence."

~Brother Yun~

Posted for the March of Books on YLCF.

Hope Comes Galloping

I long to see him face-to-face. I long to put my hand in his side, and touch the scars. I want to thank him and to worship him without this confounded veil between us. Just fighting to believe can make you weary, and faith is hard to hold. 

But we are given moments of reprieve. Easter comes around and the pews are full of every-Sunday sinners and once-in-a-blue-moon saints. The ice melts. The daffodils glow like little suns. We remember the earth-shaking fact of the resurrection of Jesus, and hope comes galloping in from the east, trumpeting the tune of victory.

~ Andrew Peterson ~

Read the rest, and listen to an achingly lovely song, here:
Easter Song of the Day: "Risen Indeed"

He is risen!

Book Review - Glaen

Glaen - by Fred R. Lybrand

I’ve always been skeptical of books that claim to be novels but are actually nothing more than sermons in (lame) disguise.

Glaen was not one of those books.

The subtitle says it right off - A novel message on romance, love, and relating. No tricks. The message is the main point of the book. But once you know that, you can relax and dive into a compelling story woven through with relationship principles that we learn along with the main character, Annie.

Glaen reminded me a little of Peter Kreeft’s books in which Socrates travels to different places in time to have lively discussions with everyone from Marx to modern college professors. But more plot happens in Glaen, so it’s a bit more readable.

Enough about the style. What, you might ask, is the book actually about?

A Girl, a Professor, and an Assignment about... Relationships?

The Socrates-like character, the mysterious professor Glaen, helps Annie, a college student, with an assignment about how relationships work. She makes observations, notices lies and countering truths, and discovers the “secrets” of great relationships that are almost too simple to believe (but rarely practiced). Her observations come in the midst of interaction with her parents and friends.

This is not another dating vs. courtship book. I guarantee that the core principles in Glaen are applicable to you, whatever the state of your relationships – single, dating, or married. 

Personally Challenging

This book came out at a perfect time in my life! Not that I have fully begun to live out all the truths, by any means, but I have been given unmistakable opportunities to practice them.

I can’t give away the plot, or tell you everything Annie discovers – you’ll have to read the book yourself to find out! But I will share one truth (for now) and how it has challenged my thinking and actions.

Lie – If you follow the right process, you will be guaranteed a good marriage.

Countering Truth – No process can guarantee a good relationship, because there are no future guarantees in relationships. Relationships happen in the present.

A while back I adopted the notion that if I just do things carefully and right, God would give me a permanent (and reasonably perfect) marriage some day. To this end, I began reading about and clinging to the concept of courtship instead of dating. It seemed such a great plan, I thought.

But as various conversations in conjunction with this book have been teaching me, even the best plan cannot guarantee the future. Cling to good principles, yes, but then leave the future to God and focus on being honest, putting others first, speaking the truth in love, and relating without strings or requirements.

Here’s a quote to that effect that I copied and stuck on my desk:

When someone accepts the fact that she cannot know the future, then a new kind of power or opportunity comes into her life. She can quit trying to force and manipulate the future. She can quit trying to control her relationships. In fact, she should finally be able to start enjoying the relationship once she gives up on trying to guarantee its future.

Glaen, page 77

This principles in this book are tough, but in the end also incredibly freeing. If you’re hungry for truth that will help you start relating in a way that works, go with Annie and meet the strange character, Glaen.

Posted in the March of Books on YLCF

short-and-fast posting attempt

Can I write and post an entry in  7 minutes?  Let's see!  How about a cool picture? 

Yikes - took me 5 minutes to decide on a random one!  This is from my trip several years ago to Iowa to visit my older brother, Sam.  I think we're at Panera Bread.  Don't I have a fine brother?  He's not only handsome - more importantly, he's a man of character and deep thought.

Wow, there went my 7 minutes of blogging! Things to do today, places to go, people to see... farewell!

A random ramble - West Texas Wind

Note - I wrote the following "ramble" probably two-and-a-half  years ago, when I was living with my Abilene family out in the country.  Sometimes little things stir memories which simply must be recorded, and this was one of those times.  Reminds me of where I've been, of days past, of God's whispers and gifts from my childhood.  He's the same God today, and no less full of wonder and beautiful mystery.     

Today I smelled the wind. He was lusty and strong, and brought smells of watered grass. Not sure why, since it was only a warm winter day, with more ice to come. Maybe it was just the grass’s growing pangs, like the souring scent of a bowl of bubbling yeast dough. But it said, “Remember me, old friend? I know you, girl from the West Texas middle-o-nowhere town.”

And I remember the little league fields, my brothers playing, I on the cold stands or in the dirt with toy animals, whipped about by the unchecked gusts. Or stepping outside to dibble in my garden, to carry trash to the huge dumpster and hope I wouldn’t have to chase any old napkins across our acres, or running out on adventures through the back lot of mesquites and tall grass and threat of rattlers and lure of forts.

Sometimes it could be such a cold through-your skin chilly wind. Or in summer it was hot and parching, like a giant trying to melt the ice that actually wasn’t on you. Spring and fall, though, were nice. Then it was gentler, with the excitement of change. Growth and coziness. The two beautiful calls, one outdoors, one in. The heath and hearth both beautiful, both hinted and hummed and heavily hearkened by my friend, the gusty wind.

"Even though You take him..."

I'm still thinking about my last post.  Here's a song by Andrew Peterson about Abraham and Isaac that exemplifies the faith I want.    I'm not even a parent yet - I need help imagining this!

Holy is the Lord

Like I said, I'm not a parent yet, but the time to practice this faith is always now.

What am I still clinging to tightly, which God may be asking to hold?  Long-held convictions which (though I hate to admit it) may not be true?  Old ruts which I thought were right for so long, but which may need to be filled so I can live a more Christlike life, moment-to-moment, choice by choice?  Little moments of self-gratification?  Assumptions which keep me "safe," but which could be hindering truth from coming out, and real relating from happening?

Big things?  Little thing?

Some things He asks us to give are sinful.  Others are good.

It is all of me He wants, not just the parts I think need changing.  Am I willing to give all?  Do I trust my God? 

Holy is the Lord, Holy is the Lord

And the Lord I will obey

Lord, help me, I don't know the way

Mine

And all the time the joke is that the word "mine" in its fully possessive sense cannot be uttered by a human being about anything.   ~ The Screwtape Letters (Chapter 21), by C. S. Lewis~

One must be careful of the awful smallness and selfish possessiveness that can creep in with that small word "mine."

In Till We Hace Faces, it was one of Orual's deepest flaws, hidden from herself until near the end.  She thought she loved her sister Psyche.  But her "love" was a possessive hunger that wanted Psyche all to herself.  Better for her to die and still be Orual's, than for the God of the Mountain to love, woo, and steal her away.   

When I was over at the my friends' house last week, Sarah was trying to break her little girl Rebekah of the habit of saying "mine" of almost everything.  "It's not nice to say 'mine,'" she would say.  She wasn't concerned with Rebekah using it in a purely true and factual sense.  But it is clearly an inborn tendency to call things "mine" which are not ours at all (like Sarah's drink from Sonic which Rebekah tried to claim - even Sarah's jacket!).

Even when things are "ours" in some sense, they should never be clutched and clung to, but rather held with an open hand.  Even when I'm married, and I say "my husband"  - even then he will not be mine so much as Christ's.

He alone makes, redeems, and truely owns anything.  He has purchased us with His blood!  How can I claim any rights or ownership of anything?

Because God really owns all, He sometimes takes away what is "ours" (friends, family, posessions, health) to work on them, or us, or both.  He cares for His own better than we know.   

Lord, please help me learn to not say "mine" the wrong way.   Instead, help me hold out everything in my hands, look to You, and say, "Yours."

When the King calls, will you give what you cherish the most to Him?

Psyche's Longing

"What is it?" said I, looking down at her lap where our four hands were joined.

"This," she said, "I have always - at least, ever since I can remember - had a kind of longing for death."

"Ah, Psyche," I said, "have I made you so little happy as that?"

"No, no, no," she said.  "You don't understand... It was when I was happiest that I longed most.  It was on happy days when we were up there on the hills, the three of us, with the wind and the  sunshine... where you couldn't see Glome or the palace.  Do you remember?  The colour and the smell, and looking across at the Grey Mountain in the distance?  And because it was so beautiful, it set me longing, always longing.  Somewhere else there must be more of it.  Everything seemed to be saying, Psyche come!  But I couldn't (not yet) come and I didn't know where I was to come to. It almost hurt me.  I felt like a bird in a cage when the other birds of its kind are flying home."

~ from Till We Have Faces by C. S. Lewis ~

Drizzly Day

This morning I went up to write at Barnes and Noble.  I indulged in a warm and chocolaty Cafe Mocha (with whipped cream, of course!) and a pizza pretzel, purchased with the help of a gift card.  Thanks, Jonny my dear brother! 

The whole day has been foggy, grey, wet.  A bit chilly.  You'd think it would be perfect to get tons of writing done.  But instead I mostly read about self-publishing (probably the route we're taking with the Hope for Relationships book) and looked at the Forgiveness chapter. I also looked at the Chicago Manual of Style, which I've read is a necessity for serious writers.  In a quick flip-through, though, it seemed huge and confusing to me, and most of it seemed like stuff I'd never need to know.  And it was about fifty bucks.  Maybe I'll get it on sale sometime.  Maybe. 

Then I ran an errand, came home, deboned a chicken, and made soup and stock and a bowl of chicken meat for chicken salad later.  While listening to Adventures in Odyssey and the Boundless Podcast.

After that, I went to visit my friend Sarah C.  She's perky, sensible, cheerful, and wise, and she's excited about so many of the same things I am (like homeschooling, wives staying at home, gardening, frugal meal-planning, raising animals to eat, sewing).    We've been walking together every week lately, but since it was not so nice outside today and her little girl, Rebekah, was still sleeping, we just talked and ran to the post office (Sarah's husband was home - don't worry!).  Sarah is such a blessing, like the older sister I never had.  I'm so thankful the church body is really a family, and I actually do get her as a sister! :-)

Then I came home and wrote a flier for the tea party we're having after AWANA Quizzing. Drove through the drizzle to pick up Bob from basketball practice.  Came home again, ate delicious Chicken Enchilada Soup if I do say so myself... hey, I may have mixed up the ingredients, but God made them, so I think I can be delighted with soup to His glory. :-)  And watched a  Leave It To Beaver  episode on Netflix with Whit (Bob), until he left (again) to watch another MCA team's game.

And here I am, writing this rambly post, listening to the chicken stock on the stove boil down so it will take up less room in the freezer.    Thinking about the book I've been reading - Passion and Purity.  Wondering how best I can trust God and wait patiently for my man to lead at the right time.  (Until we both say "I do," only God knows for sure who he is, anyways!)   I'm thinking about how much I assume I know guys' minds, when I ought to have a quiet spirit and respect them enough to speak or be silent as they choose.  Lord, help me!

Well, I'd better stop blathering on.  Tomorrow is near.  Besides normal book and house work, I need to research the science behind bread, learn what kinds of bread they made in the medieval ages, dig out books on calligraphy and knotwork and illuminated manuscripts, and maybe repair my blue medieval dress.   Three dear and creative kids are coming over for a fun homeschool afternoon in a few days, and I need to be prepared.  What fun - I don't even have my own kids yet, and already I get the joy and excitement of practicing hands-on teaching!

Oh dear, I'm about to fall asleep here.  Have a lovely Tuesday night, and I hope your Wednesday is full of happiness in God! 

Sacrifice before Rebirth

Most assuredly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain.    ~ John 12:24 ~

If I hold spiritual blessings or friendship for myself they will corrupt me, no matter how beautiful they are.  I have to pour them out before the Lord, give them to Him in my mind, though it looks as if I am wasting them...  ~Oswald Chambers~

The very longings themselves can be offered to Him who understands perfectly.  The transformation into something He can use for the good of others takes place only when the offering is put into His hands.

What will He do with these offerings?
Never mind. He knows what to do.   

~Elizabeth Elliot~

A good and perfect gift, these natural desires.  

But so much the more necessary that they be 

restrained, controlled, corrected, even crucified, 

that they might be reborn in power and purity for God.

~Elizabeth Elliot~