Friday, July 07, 2006

Sobering joy


Today some sudden horrid thoughts attacked all in a rush. What if I marry a regular "nice guy" by accident? What if married life is much less exciting than my expectations? What if I never have kids and the opportunity to teach and nurture and grow younglings of my own as a legacy? Or what if I'm a terrible mom? Supposing I don't finish college, when my parents and grandparents are counting on me? Suppose I do, but I need to work and can never find anything better than selling chicken, again? Will I always sit at home mindlessly surfing the net, doing the endless circle of life that is dishes, and never get to do any big great work?

Sobering.

And almost in the next moment a warmth and a glory take fear's place. I remembered that Christ would still be with me, and I could rest in my all-sufficient Redeemer. Me, my whole life, can and should now be seen through Christ's glorious cross! All dulness He can make gleam. All misery He has made profitable and a way to fellowship with Him. All the unexpected little beauties and daily common things He's just waiting to show me and say, "See? I made that person able to smile! Guess who thought up that fly spider? And the cat with all her pert cleaning instincts and content thrummy insides? Sit and listen. I have saved you to know my glory! No life, knowing and showing that, is worthless!"
I'm still praying for the godly husband beyond my dreams, and a great many more good things. But the greatest gift is already mine.

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous7:52 AM

    I can't count the number of times I have had similar thoughts - but you summed them up perfectly, Rael. We have a loving Redeemer who has created so many beautiful things for us, and even planned out every second of our life - what right have we to worry? :)

    We can help each other remember, right? :)

    ~Charity
    JEREMIAH 29:11

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  2. Most definitly, Charity. That's what friends are for! ;) Thanks for your sweet encouragement.

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