It happened 2,000 years ago. The innocent Lamb of God died in my place. I plan to read the account in at least one of the Gospels today. I just read Isaiah 53 this morning. But some things must be seen to feel their weight and horror.
Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.~Isaiah 53:4,5